5.21.2009

Don't Be A Stupid Zealot

I was driving home the other day and I saw a bumper sticker that completely floored me. "If Mary were Pro-Choice, there would be no Christmas!" Reading this made me physically angry on many levels and I do not know why, exactly. If you are going to run around on a moral high horse, at least have some sense in your fucking head. I mean, it's one thing to act like your superior to everyone, but when an idiot does it, I just get pissy.

First off, being pro-choice does not mean "abort every baby ever conceived". I know that is what the lifers would like everyone to believe, but rational people that are pro-choice simply believe it is a decision each woman or couple should make for themselves. Otherwise, they'd call themselves "Pro-killallthebabiesyea!" which honestly does not have the same ring to it. Not everyone in this world should bring children into it. In fact, this world would be a much better place if abortion were more common, accepted and acceptible. 9 out 10 stillborn crack babies agree.

Second, I would assume that your intent was to make stupid people lament the absence of presents, Christmas trees, Santa and the other pagan traditions Christians usurped for what we now call Christmas. Based on how few of the holiday traditions are actually inspired by Christ, it seems to me that all we would lose out on, really, is the nativity scenes in front of our local churches. Personally, me not being a Christian and all, I wouldn't care, either way. If you really think the majority of people in the world celebrate Christ's birthday on December 25th, you are deeply delusional.

Last but not least, what your bumper sticker should have said is "If Mary were Pro-Choice, there would be no Christians!" That is really the only thing that would change. Take away Christ and our society would have found some other annual bullshit reason to hang out with relatives we don't even talk about the rest of the year, much less go to visit. I am not saying I wish Christians did not exist, because if they didn't, some other religion would be number one and it wouldn't be terribly different. I am simply saying that based purely on what most of the Christmas traditions we observe have absolutely nothing to do with Christ. So how much would removing him from it really change things? It's not like Jesus is at the end of every Christmas parade, waving at kids in his big red suit.

For the record, this is not an attack on Christians in any way. It's directed purely at idiotic zealots that spout outrageous statements to get their point across. I've read a decent chunk of the Bible in some form or another and I spent my formative years going to church on a regular basis. I believe Christianity, like all religions, has a lot of good qualities and ideals that are worth living by. I also believe that most of the people I have met that call themselves Christian do not come anywhere close to the virtues of the man they claim to idolize. Unless you think trying to eradicate other cultures that do not subscribe to your beliefs is what he would want. It is actually possible to be a good person without being a Christian. Scary thought, I know.

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